Third Time First Time

“For I am confident of this very thing that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.” 

Philippians 1:6 

What’s the difference between a first-time parent and a third-time parent? Haha…just the visuals alone can be comedy. The typical first-time parent panicking about everything – filled with anxiety. Nursing v. bottles. Teething. Sleep schedules. Sleep training methods. Is the baby hungry or tired or both or something else? When is baby going to roll over, pull up, start cruising, and walking? Ohing and ahing over every molecular twitch. Pictures of everything.  

Third time parent – completely at ease.  

Here is the kicker – The mechanics of parenting newborns are largely the same for the first time parent and the third time parent. Feed baby. Clean baby. Sleep baby. But first time parent is a mess. Third time parent is cool and calm. Why? Because the third time parent has “been there done that.”  

So, here’s my question – what would life look like if we could go through our days, and all of our issues, with the confidence of a third time parent? 

Track me.  

In Mark 4:35-41 Jesus is on a boat in the middle of the Sea of Galilee with His disciples. He is enjoying a nap. A life-threatening storm develops. The disciples panic, wake Jesus, and question whether He really cares about them (The irony in the scene is thick.). Jesus stands, turns towards the storm, and rebukes the winds causing them to cease. The disciples are in awe.  

Now, how would the disciples handle the same situation if they encountered it a second time?  

How would the disciples handle the same situation if they encountered it a third time? 

Unexpected life-threatening storm. Jesus present. Third time.  

I suggest they would not panic. They would not question Jesus’s compassion. They would not respond AT ALL like they did the first time. They would handle the storm by faith and get to the rest of their day. 

Now, what would the boat scene have looked like for the disciples to handle the first storm like it was the third storm? (Mark 4:35-41 would certainly read differently!) 

How much would your life change if you could walk through this day the first time, and all the issues of this day, as if it was the third time through? How much could you be saved from anxiety and fear and insecurity? How much confidence could you enjoy EVEN THOUGH the issues are the same.  

What’s the difference?  

Confidence in the faithfulness of our Father. 

For many American Christians, there is a difference between believing in and having confidence in. Many believe in the Triune God of the Bible. Few seem to have confidence in the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.  

The game-changing, day-shifting, internal reality altering question is – how confident are you in your Father’s faithfulness? In every day and everything of your life how sure are you that if you follow your Father’s leading He will provide?  

Many of us never graduate from first-timers to third-timers because of fear. Our fear of His provision keeps us from even trying to trust Him. Or we fear that His provision will not be what we want or will not be as good as we believe we can provide for ourselves.  

Many of us never progress out of ignorance. We do not really know how following Him and receiving His provision works. We have accepted a superficial means of operating in relationship with our Father that rarely penetrates and, therefore, rarely makes a substantive difference.  

Can you imagine what a person’s internal reality would look like if they lived each day in absolute confidence that in all things God their Father will be faithful? No matter the issue – even issues the person has never experienced – they were sure their Father would deliver. How peace-filled would that person be? How powerful would they be?  

Compare and contrast Jesus on the boat in Mark 4 with the disciples.  

Compare and contrast third-time parent to a first-time parent. 

How does one begin to get that degree of confidence? One day, one issue at a time. Try one issue – something small.  

1. Identify the issue – Maybe you need to type a difficult email to a colleague, vendor, or client. Maybe you need to have a challenging conversation with your spouse or one of your children. Maybe you are battling insecurity because of something a specific person did to you. 

2. Write it down – Writing down your issue is enormously helpful for clarity. We can easily lose perspective trying to juggle and track all our issues in our minds.  

3. Release it to your Father – “Father, in the name of Jesus I release x into your hands. I declare that in this you are faithful. I ask you Father to speak and lead me in the way you have for me to go. Give me the words, the tone, the truth, the courage – everything I need to be faithful. In Jesus’s name, Amen.”      

4. Breathe deeply – Take few deep breaths, relaxing back into your Father’s faithfulness.  

5. Listen – the Holy Spirit will fill your heart and mind with peace and with direction. 

6. Obey – Be faithful to follow as the Spirit leads.  

Learning to trust, growing confidence, is a process. Be patient with yourself just as our Father is patient with you. As one who has given one’s life to Jesus, you have been made a son or daughter of our Heavenly Father. He loves you. He has LIFE for you. He longs to demonstrate His faithfulness to you. As you grow your internal anxiety will lessen and the voices of fear will soften.  

Expect mistakes.  

Expect difficulty. 

Breathe. Receive forgiveness and grace. 

Being a third-timer is entirely possible for everyone of us who calls upon the name of the Lord and it is what the Holy Spirit has for you to enjoy! 

I echo the incredible words of the Apostle Paul from Philippians 1:6, 

I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.